It's funny how fast your plans can change!

Note: This entry is going to be long... very long! As much as I wanted to share with you what has happened with Jeff, I also wanted to document the events so years from now we can come back and read it. This blog tends to be like a journal for me, so it may be a little wordy and have facts that you might not really care about!

On Wednesday March 10th, Jeff was walking back to the office after dropping off the van at the service station for 1:00pm when he slipped on some ice and fell hard on his left hip. Luckily there was a couple driving by that saw him fall and stopped to help. He managed to pull himself to a bench, but when the couple said they would drive him to the office, he couldn't stand. After a few tries the couple said they had better call an ambulance. So, the ambulance came and brought him to the emergency room.

I got a phone call at 2:30pm from a nurse saying that he had fallen and hurt his hip, and so I rushed out the door (I was staying home that day to write my sermon, so I hadn't showered or put on anything other than my sweatshirt and old jeans). I got to the hospital and saw Jeff lying on a stretcher waiting to go in for X-rays. I must say, on my way to the hospital I was kind of thinking, "what a wuss! I'm sure its just bruised!" lol! As soon as I saw him though I knew it was broken. He was having muscle spasms and each time he would grab the bars of the bed and wince at the pain. I've never seen him in so much pain. It was hard to watch. I knew it was broken because a lady from our previous church broke her hip and she had made the exact same sounds and facial expressions when a muscle spasm hit her.

Jeff was wheeled in for x-rays and although I couldn't be in there with him, I could hear him. He says on a scale from 1-10 (and this is the scale the doctors used to assess his pain) the x-ray was an 11. After waiting for about half-hour, he was wheeled out to a room to wait for the doctor. It wasn't too long before they came in and said it was a bad break and that he would have to be airlifted to Vancouver for the surgery. I was in shock! The nurse said that I would be able to fly with him, and that I should rush home and get a bag packed for him and me and be back ASAP as she wasn't sure when the plane would be ready for him.

So off I run, calling people as I was going. Luckily I only live about 2 minutes from the hospital, so I got home quick. I started throwing things in a bag and calling to cancel meetings, talk to DHQ, get Jeff's sister to look after the animals, and letting our shelter manager know so she could look after the office while we were away. It was so hectic and rushed. I had no idea how long we were going to be gone, and I didn't know what I needed to bring. I ended up packing just one change of clothes for me and the bare necessities.

I rushed back to the hospital and waited there for a while until the paramedics came to get him prepared to fly. I began thinking that I didn't pack enough. Luckily, the paramedic told me I should bring Jeff's boots and coat home as he wouldn't need them in Vancouver. So I rushed home again and packed another bag, giving myself three days worth of clothing.

When I returned to the hospital, Jeff was still being looked after by the paramedics, he had to have a catheter, and IV and they did a marvelous job of tying his legs and feet together and then wrapping a blanket tightly around his hips which for the first time since falling gave him relief from the spasms. He said that the moment they did that his pain went from a 10 to a 1. I was so thankful for the paramedics... they were awesome!

By the time he was all strapped in and ready to be airlifted out it was 6:00pm. they wheeled him out to the ambulance and I got to sit in the front seat. They told me as we were driving to the airport that I could fly down with Jeff, but I may not be able to fly back with him. I didn't care... I would do whatever I could to be there with him.

The airport is only a few minutes drive from the hospital and by the time they got us loaded onto the airplane and we were lifting off it was 6:30pm. I must say, if the circumstances had been better, it would have been a really neat experience. It was just a tiny plane, 3 seats (two paramedics and myself) Jeff on a stretcher, and the pilot and co-pilot. People ask me how big the plane was, I respond by saying "you know it's small when the pilot can lean back and talk to you!" The flight was 3 hours, and it was during that time, when I finally had time to think, that I realised what had happened. I couldn't believe I was on an airplane being flown to Vancouver so my husband could have surgery! It just seemed crazy to me. I had no idea where I would stay or how long we would be there. I didn't know what kind of surgery he would have, or how long the recovery time would be. I didn't know if he would come home after surgery, and I wondered if he did come home how would I manage looking after him, my job, and his job. I thought of the million and one things that would need to be done while we were away and wrote a note of people to call and meetings to cancel. I also realised then that I must have looked horrible, since I hadn't showered, or done anything with my hair that day. As well, I hadn't eaten that day other than a light breakfast, so my stomach kept grumbling. I was a mess! I actually think Jeff had a better flight then I did. His pain was almost nil thanks to the paramedics and he slept the whole way. He said it was the best flight he ever had!

We arrived in Vancouver at 9:30pm and was met by another ambulance. The paramedics said that I could use my cell phone now that we had landed, but of course, I forgot to turn it off before take-off and it had run out of battery power from "roaming". I couldn't believe it. Now I'm stuck in Vancouver, and I can't call anyone, like Jeff's parents and my parents to let them know how he was (I had only been able to leave messages while I was rushing around to get ready in Whitehorse.)

Once Jeff was loaded into the ambulance we took the 20 minute trip to the Vancouver General Hospital (VGH). He went into emergency and it was a flurry of activity there. They were concerned about his temperature and his heart was beating way to fast. They were giving him pain killers, more X-rays (which he was not happy about... they HURT!) and taking his vitals. Then, the worst part, they unwrapped him. The moment they did that he went right back to having muscle spasms and right back to cringing and barely breathing. It was frustrating to see. Thankfully the Doctor came in (eventually) to put a splint on him, which helped with the spasms, but didn't help with the pressure of lying on his back the whole day.

Not long after we arrived at the hospital Jeff's Uncle came to see how we were. I had only met Uncle Ted once at our wedding, but was I ever thankful to see him! It was nice having someone to talk to and to support me. He came back to the emergency room and was able to think for me! He asked where I could plug my phone in (so I was then able to update the parents), and got me a hotel room. I stayed at the hospital until about 2:30am and then let Uncle Ted get me set up at the hotel. It was really hard leaving Jeff there, but I knew that I would be of no use to him if I burned myself out.

The next morning I woke up early to phone the hospital to see if Jeff was okay and when he would be in surgery. The nurse said that he was fine and I should call back about 8:15 once the doctor did his rounds to see when he would be in surgery. So I got ready and phoned at 8:15. That's when I found out that Jeff had just been moved to the holding room waiting for the OR to open up. I asked if I could still see him there, to which they told me no. I was also not able to talk to him. I was devastated. I don't think I've cried so much before in my life! I felt like the worst wife ever. All I kept thinking is that he would wonder why I didn't come to see him, and that I didn't care about what he was going through.

Thankfully at about 10:00am I got a call from the nurses saying that Jeff was heading into surgery within a half-hour and he would like to talk to me. The moment I heard his voice I bawled... poor guy! Here he was going into surgery and I was sobbing on the phone! lol! I told him how much I wanted to be there but I had missed him, and that I loved him. He was fine of course.. he figured that was what happened. I only talked to him for a couple minutes, but it made me sooo much more relaxed while I waited for him to come out of surgery.

At about 1:00pm I received a call from the surgeon saying everything went well. They had placed a 16 inch nail through his femur up into the ball of the joint. It took three incisions, one at his knee, one at his hip and one halfway between the two. They were small incisions. The surgeon said that for the next while he would be in recovery and that when he was sent back to his room I could come see him.

It wasn't until around 3:30pm that I got a call from the nurse saying that he was heading back to his room. I ran over to the hospital to see him. He was looking pretty good and alert for just being out of surgery. The alertness didn't stay for too long though! lol! For the next couple days he mostly slept.

Physiotherapy started working with him the next day. That first day they got him to stand with a walker and sit in a wheel chair for about an hour. The next day he stood with the walker, walked to the washroom and then sat in the chair for a little over an hour. The following day he walked with the walker out to the nurses station and back and also the washroom and wheelchair again. I was amazed at how much change there was every day with his movement.

Still, even though he was able to walk a few steps and sit in a chair, he was needing help to get in and out of bed, using the washroom and cleaning up (sponge baths). I took on the job after the first couple days, since I would have to do it all for him when we got home. I will admit it was kind of nice being needed like that! It felt a little like taking care of a 6'2" baby! :o)

On Saturday, Jeff's mom and my parents came to Vancouver to see us. Shelley stayed until Wednesday, my parents just stayed until Sunday at lunch (they had to go back to work at a camp). It was really nice having their support. When your usual support is the one that's sick it quite hard to get through the day on your own. So many times when I was at the hotel I would think of something to tell Jeff and then remember I couldn't. It was pretty lonely... but worse than that was knowing that Jeff was alone at the hospital.

On Sunday towards the end of the afternoon depression started to hit Jeff. It was quite sudden (but not unexpected). Do you know how hard it is to see your husband feeling sad? I hated it. He didn't want me to leave that night, and I stayed until 10:00pm but knew that if I didn't get home and get some sleep (and eat... I think I ate about one meal a day while I was there) I wouldn't be able to keep looking after him. It was so hard leaving him that night... and actually every night after that.

Sunday was also when the Doctor came to say that Jeff was released and they had put in the request for Whitehorse hospital to send the plane back to pick us up. Unfortunately the plane can take anywhere from 1-7 days to come. We were praying for 1 day!

Thankfully the next day we were told that the plane would be leaving Whitehorse at 3:00pm and we would be airlifted back home at 6:30pm. BEST NEWS EVER! So Monday was pretty exciting. Jeff's mom and I took him outside in the wheelchair, hoping the fresh air would help him cheer up a little. It worked for the time being. Days weren't as bad as nights for the depression.

At 5:45pm the paramedics came to get him and we headed off to the airport. At 6:30pm sharp we were on the plane and heading back home. the flight went well, and the paramedics were quite impressed with how little pain Jeff had. Actually, even the nurses and physiotherapist at VGH were pleased with his progress and how well he was doing. I guess most patients with broken hips are not 29 years old! :oP

We arrived back in Whitehorse at 9:00pm and were brought to the emergency room to wait for the doctor to assess him and assign a room. I think of all the waiting I had done up to the point, that felt the longest. I believe we were there for almost 2 hours. I just wanted to see him get settled and get home to see the dog and sleep in my own bed! It was tough being so close to home, yet not being able to go there. I can only imagine what it felt like for Jeff.

At about 11:45pm we were taken to a room upstairs and the nurse got him settled in. It was 12:30am when I finally left and went home. The animals were excited to see me and I was excited to see them. I was looking forward to sleeping in my own bed, but I still didn't sleep too well. My thoughts were always on Jeff. I hated leaving him at night cause that's when he would get lonely and sad. Poor guy.

Tuesday the physiotherapist came to see him and was very impressed with his movement. He actually had him walking the halls and doing a whole flight of stairs (7 of them!) both ways. WOW! I was impressed. He no longer needed the walker and was now on crutches. Tuesday afternoon I was able to get him in the shower, which had to feel great after a week of sitting in bed and only getting sponge baths. I must say, the bathroom was almost flooded by the time he was done and out! lol! Poor janitor!

Not long after, our family doctor came and said that he was free to go home. I panicked a little! I hadn't had time to get the house prepared nor to pick up the items we would need to loan from the Red Cross. So, Jeff stayed in the hospital that night so I could get everything done.

On Wednesday, one week after his fall, Jeff came home. It was late afternoon by the time he was discharged (he did some more stairs and walking and I was taught how to dress his incisions). He surprisingly didn't find it too hard to get into the van or to come up the stairs into the house, which were worries we had at first. It really helps that he's a strong guy and can use his arms to lift himself up.

Once home he was pretty tired and went to bed for pretty much the rest of the day. He finds if he's up too much, he gets really exhausted, though everyday it gets better and better.

It's been nice to be home, but at the same time a little stressful. We aren't equipped with a bed that lowers and moves (which is the way he was able to get comfortable at the hospital). As well, our bathroom isn't exactly "handicap" accessible, so its been a challenge with the items Red Cross gave us to use. I think we've modified it well enough though.

The nights are still the worst part of the day. Jeff can't seem to sleep on his side yet, and so sleeping on his back is becoming tiresome. Then, every few hours he's up to take his pill or use the bathroom, which all include me. I don't mind at all doing it (I'm actually liking that he depends on me... must be the mothering side of me!) but I am alittle concerned about how I'm going to do once I head back to the office.

This morning at 8:30am our social worker came to the house to do an interview with me. I figured it would be a good test to see how it would go, being up early and having Jeff settled before she got here. It worked out well, though I did have an extra hour then what I planned because my alarm clock went off at 6:00am rather than 7:00am!

Tomorrow Jeff goes to our family doctor to have a check-up and to get his staples out. I hope everything is okay with the incisions. They look really good but what do I know!

Jeff has another 4 weeks to go before he has another x-ray to see how the bone healed. If all goes okay he will head back to work and normal activities then. I don't see it being a problem, considering how great he's doing so far. What this does mean for me though is that for the next 4 weeks I'm on my own. I will be looking after him, the house, my job and his job. It's going to be hectic and to tell you the truth I'm a little nervous about it. But thankfully over the next month we are going to be having lots of company. Mom and Dad are coming this Friday for a couple weeks, then our Divisional Commander is coming to do our review (sorry for any non-Salvation Army folks who don't understand those terms!) Next will be our friends from BC for a week, and then Jeff's dad will come at the end of April. It will be nice to have some help and company around.

So, for the next while I will be concentrating on Jeff and getting him back on his feet (and making more and more fun of his "old person" injury), as well as keeping The Salvation Army here afloat (with lots of help from our great staff and DHQ). Thankfully the homestudy process will still be able to continue, though it will set us back a few sessions.

If you've read through this entire entry I congratulate you and I ask, as always, for your prayers!

Shannon

YIKES... kids need a lot of things!

We've now had two homestudy meetings and each have been great. I think we've connected well with our social worker and the best part is that she's a Christian, so she understands our beliefs and values. So far we've just gone over family history, our thoughts on certain subjects, and how we would describe ourselves. She has also walked through the house, and seemed pleased. There are a few things that we will obviously need to change and fix before we have a child (ie. childproofing) but for right now it's all good.

This past week I've been thinking a lot about what we need to buy for a child, and I must say I'm a little freaked out! lol! Jeff and I went to Walmart the other day and ventured into the baby section (which may I say felt very strange!) and we were looking at all the things we will need. There's TONS of things to think about, and tons of money to be spent! It's a little overwhelming... so I think we will just start to buy stuff now. I'm thinking things like sippy cups, bath towels and childproofing items are safe to get since whether we get an infant or a toddler we will need them. I've started a list of what we will need... if you want to give me any pointers I would love to have them!

We are trying to stay realistic about how long it may take to be placed with a child, but I will admit it's hard not to dream about it. I just hope that when the time comes we are as prepared as we can be!

Homestudy

Last week we recieved a call from the adoption co-ordinator who wanted to know where we were with our criminal record checks. I think I mentioned in the last post that the fingerprints that we sent away to Ottawa to get processed came back because we didn't send in everything that was needed. So I told her that we were now having to start all over and send them again (it takes 3 months for them to be processed). She said that's too bad because a social worker just had a spot open that she would have liked us to take. My heart dropped! I was thinking "GREAT when will the next spot open!". But thankfully she said that even without all the paperwork in place she was going to let us take that spot! So tomorrow we will be starting our homestudy! YAY! We are really excited to start this process. Once our homestudy is complete we will officially be on the waiting list for a child. As well we will be able to start getting our name out there that we are looking for a child that needs a loving home. Don't be surprised if you get an e-mail from me asking you to keep your ears open for us!

I'm hoping the homestudy doesn't take too long. Our worker said that it usually takes about 4 months. She did say however that she would like to speed that up a little for us. We were told that this social worker doesn't like to let the dust settle on things and really likes to just get it done, which is awesome news for us! I really hope that we connect well with her and that she likes us. I feel a little like Monica and Chandler on Friends! lol!

Keep the prayers coming everyone... we are very thankful for them!

Shannon